Little advice here please guys | New Dads | Dad Chat Forums

Well hello there for a start :) Im Daniel for the UK father to jayden 4 months old

Well were to start really not sure how to put this into context without making me sound like some evil bigot who is incapeable of love and effection towards a little one..

it all started i would say on the very first night my little boy arrived home from hospital i knew we was in for a rough time i mean heck new babys are not exacly a walk in the park by any means so off me and the missus went to bed with jayden in our room in his moses bascket and as expected we got no sleep at all phew very tireing for first time parents. Anyway this carred on as we thought for many weeks to come, after id say around 2 half months old this all changed he slept from around 9pm to around 8am and i thought great we have cracked this sleeping lark! yay..but after 3 weeks back again to this sleep deprivation argh well to make matters worse this is not my only problem in fact it is just the tip of the iceberg, now i would like to say befor spilling my guts out to you good fellas out there that i have tryed and tryed to bond with the little one but i have found it impossible, he seems attached to his mums bottom constatly, we never have time to ourselfs (except fridays wen his grandmar has him for the evening) i find myself getting extreamly frustrated with everything the boy does, making noises when he is taking his bottle, constant moaning for attention from his mum, the fact it takes us nearly 9 hours a nite to get him to sleep with no let up, (gives in and goes to sleep 3-4am every nite) I feel so so bad for saying it but i fear im starting to hate my own son, now i know hate is a very strong word but im starting to feel no love towards him and like i always want to be away from him, when he goes to the shops with his mum or comes back from his grandmas i hear the door open and the crying start straight away and i feel my heart sink to the bottom of my stomace as i know what is comming and what is on the horizen..i  feel so lonely and depressed it is really effecting me, please dont look at me as a bad person for saying all this but i feel i have to vent it out somewere and i fear if i go to the doctors on this one they will think i am crazy and send the little one away.

Advice please please guys

Daniel

hey glenn

cheers for the speedy answer my friend so nice to hear someone feels/has felt the same way i do. so a doctors appointment shouldnt be on the cards you think then? just ride the storm as they say? it is a very strange feeling as i have wanted a little one since my mid teens (now 27) and now i have what i have always wanted i wish i didnt at times, but i shall take your advice on board and see how things pan out :)

thanks again my friend

Daniel

jay

hello mate and thanks for your reply i have heard and seen this lady on the internet me i am willing to try anything just to get a much needed rest i assure you my girlfriend on the other hand is a little different am i to assume ths is the same lady who does the controled crying? We have tryed this on two seperate occasions and both my girlfriend couldnt handle him crying, fair enough i thought but she was expecting an over night fix which is never going to happen i will have a chat to her about it and let you know :) thnx again for your reply jay and glad you sorted out the sleeping with your daughter

Daniel

hey guys

have spoken to the girlfriend about gina fords method and she says its only fot babies aged 6 months+ and as our little one is only 4 month maybe a little too young? sleepign seems to be getting worse atm he is going to sleep as always around 2am but now a few hours later he is waking once again as apposed to staying asleep for 6 hours plus argh its up and down like tower bridge :( on the plus side me and the little one had a smile and a laugh together today first time for weeks felt really nice to have a small conection with him for once :)

Sulli

glenn

cheers for the kind words not counting my chickens just yet but it appears there is sunshine over the clouds here, we started to ween jayden onto food a week or so back and we stopped for one day as we forgot to buy his veg from the supermarket and from that day on he has been sleeping well, granted waking up an hour or 2 after we put him down at first but after that he is sound asleep all the way through, so we have figured it could have been the food being the problem that he is a little young to be weening yet? the say 4-6 months is best time to start he is under 4 months of course…so we are living in hope at the moment that is what was causing him to wake up all the time

thnx again

Sulli